POSTCARDS FROM BED - Charlie Thorpe
RESTING SPACE
Daddy, why is that lady on the floor?
She wore her ‘nice’ clothes for this: swishy velvet skirt,
statement heeled boots. Grey lips cleaving to burnt red
lipstick. Weary eyes propped wide open by a few careful
strokes of a magic wand. She painted herself well,
masking exhaustion with layers of bright colour. Making
herself acceptable to the onlooker.
Even so, uncomfortable Dad eyes up the Strange Stranger
lying on the floor.
(Drunk, in the Tate of all places. On a Sunday at 11am.)
She watches – horizontal – as pairs of feet pace the
gallery. Uncomfortable Dad pulling curious child away.
But curious child sees things with a new perspective.
Daddy, is she a piece of art?
FATIGUE IS A MEMORY OF FRAGMENTS
Fatigue is a memory of fragments. Splashes of colour,
snatches of half-remembered conversation. Flashes of
intense, intrusive memory. Everything else having an
underwater quality like swimming through thought-soup.
Waking sleep-starved in an unrecognisable body.
Words become inadequate. She is reduced to that which
remains: this body, these parts, fleeting moments of
stillness, everything in flux. (Something under the surface,
something unsayable and dangerous.) Grief washes over
her in unexpected waves, and she finds herself drifting in
a tide of rage-acceptance, rage-acceptance. The back-
and-forth rhythm of adjusting to a new body. Loss
intrudes, laying her bare until – numbed – she is at the
very edges of exhaustion.
Little pockets of joy are salvaged. A gentle contentment
felt deep in the bones like the first warmth of sunlight on
skin after a long and brutal winter. She begins to move
with a freedom previously unknown.
Other times her head is fizzy, colours bright and all she
can see is possibility. Her unbounded enthusiasm far out-
strips anything deemed sustainable in this new body. She
tight-rope walks the brink between burnout and living her
best life. Compromise and payback become the new
norm.
All this inner experience is rendered invisible, unknowable.
Look at her. What do you see?
THE COLONY
Crucifixed on the bedroom floor. Bare skin against cool
earth. The AC whirring in the corner as she comes back to
her body. How did she get here?
Feet dragging – body stumbling towards the bed, not
making it. She remembers sliding to the ground,
embracing this strange new earth – unknown and
unknowable.
Her shoulders are tight, holding every exhaustion and she
turns her head. Sharp left, delicious stretch. Pleasurable
pain. She watches a line of fire ants parading under the
bed. Her skin prickles, anticipating their bite, but the
earth clings to her back. Lifting her head is an
impossibility. The ants crawl towards her hair. Disgust
isn’t strong enough to counteract exhaustion.
But don’t tell my heart, my achey breaky heart. Flash of
memory: lifting heavy legs to dance in a tropical soup,
forcing herself to cooperate against the panicked advice
of her body. Step forward, heel taps. Turn. Fixed smile in
place turning into a grimace. Coercive line-dancing.
After, standing under a cold shower emptied and aching:
how did she get here?
Feet dragging down a smoggy highway as she is frog-
marched through unfamiliar streets. She is paraded
around this city until – disoriented, dizzy, legs shaking,
heart pounding, back aching – she lies cruficixed on the
bedroom floor.
There are blank spaces amongst otherwise vivid memory.
Whole periods of unknown time broken by sudden bursts
of remembering in horrific colour.
She is coerced up mountains real and of capitalist making,
all the while berated for being unwell. Have more faith.
Make more of an effort. Blank stretch of time. How did
she get here, crucifixed on the bedroom floor?
But don’t tell my heart, my achey breaky heart. Burst of
noisy memory. She watches the ants out of the corner of
her eye, creeping closer. Vision blurs. She blinks heavy
eyelids over scratchy eyes.
This body does not feel safe. Unknown and unknowable.
Hostile and uncooperative. Just make more of an effort.
Believe and be well.
She awakes shivering. Floor-bound. Glassy-eyed.
The ants have diverted around her, an unexpected halo.
MADONNA AND CHILD
Lagging behind. Left at the edge of the group. She stares
at the portrait of a mother and her child. Does this
painted woman know the unique pain of being parted
from those we cling to? Does her body ache with the
knowledge that her child is missing?
Jet lag weighs her body as she shuffles round the gallery.
Somehow, she can’t draw her eyes from this portrait:
mother and child. One body emerges from another. The
onslaught of homesickness is visceral: cold and sweating.
She feels it rising in her body, stomach dropping out as
the reality of the distance between what she knows and
how she exists now sinks in. Panic washes over her in
waves. Fault lines riddle this unfamiliar body, and she
forgets how to breathe, to be. Existence continues only in
short, shallow gasps.
Her body is an orphan.
It is not homesickness for place or people. Those have
been cut out of her like some used and useless organ.
Safety is severed. Ties to the familiar are fraying. She is
homesick for a way of being, a way of existing in this body
– once friend, now stranger.
Vision blurring. She’s back in the gallery. Kneeling on the
floor, slumped forwards against the tyranny of the
upright. All this in a moment. As the group moves on,
there is a rawness in her throat that stops her from
making a sound. Saltwater cheeks flowing for a mother
clinging to her child.
Unpredictable, untameable grief. These unacceptable
feelings mutate, attaching somehow to her shoulder
blades, a raw and invisible ache. Scar tissue. She carries it
around, counting the cost in her body.
Six thousand miles separate the body she knows and the
body she becomes.
THE ADVOCATE
Some days, she is fearless. An assured professional, she
slips on the advocate mask. Steps up to fight another’s
corner.
Tenderly, she unpacks another’s pain, holding space for
stories that rarely make the light of day. Together, they
do the work of sweeping away cobwebs and dust,
uncovering hope. She marvels at how shame scurries back
to dank, dark corners when exposed to sunlight.
This wisdom is missing in her own life. Busy day after busy
day. Detoxing from hanging on to the hustle, she lies on
the sofa, feeling the cost of these stories knotting muscles
into tight fists. Experience demands to be felt. The pain
begins to nag at her, whispering, a playful lilt: I’m coming
to get you.
Sometimes, pain slams her from the side into semi-
anticipated collapse and she can’t ignore it anymore. She
lies on the office floor, all worn-out carpet and ground-in
chewing gum matting into her hair. The strip lights flicker
overhead, and she screws her eyes tight, no longer caring
if anyone intrudes, finding her prone on the floor. Being
horizontal is a gift.
Some days, the mask slips. Her smile falters when they
tell her how well she looks, when they choose to dress up
their tokenism as ‘support’, when they choose not to see
her. They act surprised when she breaks: wearied self-
advocacy unravelling to sarcasm to shouting and
screaming, to throwing fistfuls of curses across the desk
until others come running down the hallway to check that
everything is okay, and it isn’t it isn’t it so obviously isn’t
and… she silences herself, aching with embarrassed
exhaustion. She puts on the mask – (un)professional –
ready to tenderly unpack another’s pain.
Other days she yields to gradual neglect. She becomes
passive in the face of ‘advice’ from doctor, therapist,
loved ones, colleagues. Her energy is consumed by the
barbed wire tangled inwards, sudden knots snagging on
jagged edges and she struggles to speak, to ask for what
she needs.
Later, home. Arms, legs, spirit: all numb with too much
feeling. Until you call and unpick all the ways she feels
erased. She unfurls herself from the sofa as you remind
her: it will be okay, it will all be okay. You and she are
bound by late night crackly phone line. On a dark Tuesday
in February, you break her back open to hope.
INTOXICATED
A different day. A party. Friends drawn from far flung
corners of the world and somehow meeting again under
the same ceiling. Her back protests at the journey,
carrying the impact of 4 hours’ train-standing. Even so,
she throws herself into the party, earnestly advocating for
all bodies to know the simple joy of kitchen dancing and
everything being a little too loud and a little too much and
a little too beautiful. Delirious, unsweetened joy.
She staggers to the sofa and sinks into rest. Pitstop at the
centre of the party.
Paranoia bursts in for a moment as she wonders if the
DWP will accuse her of being under the influence of too
much impossible joy. She can almost see them sneaking
in, reminding her how to play the good crip – the
misguided belief that being ill is misery sweetened only by
the consolation prize of state welfare so slim you can just
about survive. State-sanctioned poverty. Fuck the DWP.
She pushes the paranoia down with loud music and
wearied dancing. A protest of sorts.
Because today is a good day. Fuck the DWP. More
dancing, fewer drugs.
She is twirling now on a dancefloor in Camden and the
world is spinning, reeling. Colours and lights bend into
one mass of sweaty, sticky humanity and for once it’s
because she is moving. Living. Arms drooping, slower
moving. She is discovering new ways to move with her
body, not raging against it.
But later stumbling through suburbs, the cost of it hits.
Her legs are weighted again, ankles caving inwards in
collapsing shoes. The taxi driver refuses to take her
‘intoxicated’. This man does not understand the best high
comes from being well enough to live.
THE BODY KEEPS THE SCORE
Fatigue is a memory of fragments. They are woven
together by flashes of bright, brilliant pain like the first
chink of sunlight bursting through the curtains when you
just don’t want to wake up. Holy breakdown after holy
breakdown, her body learns to speak up rather than be
silent and endure. She is fractured, cracking down familiar
fault lines then gluing the pieces back together and
coating it all in glitter, a self-portrait in therapy. (Nothing
to see here.)
We hold these memories deep in our bodies. Fragments
of a life well-loved amongst frustrated attempts at rest.
We inflict violence on our bodies without even knowing
and call it survival capitalism.
Trapped, our bodies begin to panic a language of their
own. A nagging whisper: something’s not right.
Something’s not right. A persistent clicking, joints askew.
Taut shoulders, a rising ache travelling up the spine,
rippling down one arm, then the other: something’s
coming.
Please, just listen.
She has learned to listen (eventually). She has learned the
hard way. The crashing-out-in-the-middle-of-the-office-
way. The lying-down-on-the-train-floor way. The smiling-
smiling-all-is-well-until-she-lies-down-and-the-pain-takes-
her-breath-away way. The numbing-with-alcohol-twirling-
on-the-dance-floor-joyful-arms-above-your-head-and-for-
a-moment-eveything-else-fades-away way.
Let her give you some advice for a gentler way: learn to
befriend your body, to recognise and even celebrate its
unpredictable rhythms. To speak over it with kindness.
Live lightly.
Learn to live through, and around, and beyond. To
embrace, befriend, to tend to your body with the same
care we offer each other, even at our weariest, most
reluctant moments.
Learn to breathe deep and long and often. Be still like it’s
going out of style. Scrap hustle and start to rest. Protest.
Rest. Repeat.
Call your body by her name: the beloved.